In episode 6 of Live Life with Sean, I talked about Who is responsible? You can take responsibility into many different directions, like who is responsible for the COVID recovery? or who is responsible for your happiness? Sticking with your relationship to responsibility, I talked about three types of relationships with responsibility:
- You are responsible.
- You are avoiding responsibility.
- You are not responsible.
With each of these relationships, there are good and bad aspects. For example, if you are responsible, then the good is that you are in control, but it can also be bad because being responsible can overwhelm some people.
If you are not responsible, then you lose some control, because the person, who is responsible, is making the decision, but you still have some control. You control your reaction to the decision. For example, what if you are inline for a promotion that you really want and you do not get selected? How do you feel? How do you react? You are in control and responsible for your response to the selection.
I was in this situation many years ago. My boss had decided to leave and he had told me that I should be replacing him and he prepared me to take over his role. When he left, I started acting in his role before anybody told me to. I had the meetings with the team, I started driving our objectives, and then the boss appointed somebody else officially. If that wasn’t enough, my role was reduced beyond what I was already doing. Yes, at first, I was really upset. After I got through being upset, I sat down and thought about what I really wanted to do. It was really empowering to lay out what I wanted and I went to my new boss and told him what I wanted to do and I moved forward.
So, take a look around and see what you are responsible for. Is there something in your life where somebody made a decision that was out of your control and you felt trapped or adversely effected? If so, go back, and see if there is a better way for you to respond. Listen to the show as I have a process towards the end of the show where I help you release the old reaction and help you find a better one.
Thank you and please feel free to leave a comment or question below. If you would like to have a coaching session with me, please click on the Connect with Sean link.