In your lifetime, you will play many different roles. Some will last most of your lifetime and some will be come and go. Some of your roles will be more important than other roles that you have. I would suggest that you take some time to review your roles. Take an inventory of the roles that you are playing and their importance in your life at the time. Then, I would like you to consider looking at how the roles fit together.
Consider the following roles that many people play; spouse, parent, and employee. If it is important to you to spend time with your kids and your jobs has you on the road a lot of the time, are your roles as parent and employee in conflict with each other? Do you need to adjust your expectations of each role, and/or do you need to review what is important for you in those roles? For example, is travel that important to you in your role as an employee? If not, do you need to do something that will limit the amount of travel you have? Like, finding another job with less travel, or maybe changing your role from individual contributor to manager, especially if being the manager means less travel.
Maybe you like the travel and need to find some more creative ways to spend time with your children. When my daughter was younger, I would read to her every night before she went to bed. When I went on the road, as I was packing, she would give me a book to read to her and I would Skype her every night to read to her. Maybe you could use the travel time and technology to spend time virtually with your children. What about using technology to show them the places that you are visiting so that they can get some of the experience with you.
In some cases, maybe you need to add a role to help you meet the needs of another role. What if you wanted to spend more time with your children, but seem to be stuck in a rut about what to do. What if you added the role of scout troop leader, or baseball coach? It would give you an opportunity to hopefully do something you like and spend time with your children. When my kids were growing up, I coached my step-son’s lacrosse team and my daughter’s softball team. This allowed me to combine my love for sports with coaching and spending time with my children.
Maybe you need to consider when you are fulfilling certain roles. I try to keep myself healthy and before I became a parent, that meant working out after work. It fit my schedule and I enjoyed it. After becoming a parent, my children had activities after school, which ran into the times when I wanted to work out. It became too easy to blame their activities on me not keeping in shape, until I decided to make a change. I decided instead of working out in the evening, I would work out in the mornings. It took me a bit of time to get used to getting up and going to the gym, but I have learned to enjoy it. I found that I control my mornings and enjoy the piece and quiet before the family gets moving in the morning. I even get up earlier than I used to and use the time for other activities for myself like meditating and writing.
These are just some of my thoughts on How do your roles fit together? You can listen to some more of my thoughts on my podcast for the latest episode of Live Life with Sean. Live Life with Sean should be available on your favorite podcast app! If you are enjoying my podcast, please subscribe to it, like it, or leave a comment about it, as this will help other find the show. If you would like me to speak at your next event, or would like a coaching session with me, please go to Connect with Sean page and enter your information.
Until next time, have a wonderful day!